Now Leaving Sunnydale
by forsaken2003
Summary: Spike decides to leave Sunnydale tired of being used by Buffy.


Title: Now Leaving Sunnydale

Author: Forsaken2003

Pairing: S/X

Rating: PG

Disclaimer: I own none, all belong to Joss Whedon

Comments: Always welcomed!

Summary: Spike decides to leave Sunnydale tired of being used by Buffy.

Warnings/Spoilers:

Season 6

Beta'd by: Unbeta'd

Note: Sorry I haven't posted in awhile. Real life and writers block is my nemesis! I'll still be posting but as of right now it won't be a lot. :(

Spike was done. Done with Sunnydale and definitely done with Buffy. For most of his life and all of his unlife he was always someone's lap dog. But no more. He was the big bad and would no longer be strung around by his unbeating heart. He grabbed a duffel bag from under his bed and began stuffing it with clothes, books and his Sex Pistols CD. None of the other stuff mattered to him. He grabbed the cooler and started to fill it with the blood bags from his mini fridge Xander graciously gave him after moving out of the basement of doom. With a slam on the coolers lid Spike was ready to pack up the Desoto and get the hell out of dodge.

Just than the door opened and for a split second he thought it was Buffy. Spike was about to tell her to bugger off until he realized the scent wasn't Buffy's but Xander's. Without looking at his uninvited guest Spike asked, "what do you want?"

"That's not how you greet your friends. We've talked about this," Xander chastised jokingly though there was something different with his voice.

If it had been anyone else right now Spike would have ignored it but it was Xander. His one true friend. So he turned around and saww Xander was a mess. His hair was ruffled and he had a black eye and his lip was cut and puffy. "Bloody hell! Did a demon do that to you?"

Xander scratched the back of his neck. "More like an ex-demon."

"Anya did that to you?" Spike asked as he pointed at Xander's face. "Why? You cheat on her?"

"No!" Xander yelled offended. Okay so he cheated on Cordelia. He was an asshole back in high school. His face crumpled. "I'd never do that to her. I never want... I never wanted to hurt her," he corrected himself. He did hurt her though.

Spike sighed and sat down. He could spare a few minutes before heading out. "What did you do?"

"I called off the wedding," Xander leaned against the cement wall and slid down. "She didn't take it well."

"Clearly," Spike said sarcastically. "Why did you call off the wedding?"

With a shaky breath Xander managed to spit it out. "I couldn't marry her because no matter how much I love her I love you more." His eyes widened and couldn't believe he actually said those words to Spike. He had wanted to for months but thought it wasn't right. That it wasn't fair. Not to Anya but it would have been worse marrying Anya. It would have been a lie. When Spike didn't say anything Xander's mouth decided to take over. "I know that you having feelings for Buffy and I'm not trying to make things weird between us but living on the hellmouth... there really isn't time for regrets and not telling you how I feel would have been one of my biggest regrets."

Spike didn't know what to say. He'd never had anyone tell him they had feelings for him, he was always the second choice. "I'm leaving Sunnydale."

"I... what?" Xander didn't know what he expected Spike to say but that was out of left field.

"I'm leaving," Spike said. "Sunnydale has always been my downfall and I'm making changes in my life."

Xander jumped to his feet and made his way to Spike only stopping a few feet away making sure to give Spike his space. "Spike, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said anything. It was selfish and not fair to you. Please don't leave. You're the only person that cares about me."

"That's not true," Spike answered. It was a lie. Everyone else had there own things their own problems. Buffy trying to deal with being pulled out of heaven, Willow addicted to magic, and Dawn being a klepto. Spike saw how much Xander tried being there for all of them but they just pushed him away.

"Yeah, it is." Xander looked around and noticed the the duffelbag already filled. It dawned on him. "You were leaving before I came."

Spike nodded but his mind was else where. Xander was in love with him. How didn't he notice? Well the answer was simple he was too obsessed with Buffy to see anything else going on around him. Just like Willow's addiction if he had been paying attention he would have been able to spell the increase of magic around her.

"Were you going to say goodbye?" Xander asked.

"Honestly I hadn't thought that far into my plan," Spike stated. "I just know I've got to go. I've got to get away from that damn slayer."

Xander looked confused. "Buffy? What happened with Buffy? You guys were getting along so well. I mean you were the only one she'd open up to." There was no jealously in his voice. He was just happy that Buffy had someone she could talk to.

"Opened up to?" Spike snorted. "The only thing she was opening were her legs." Spike didn't even realize what he'd said until he saw the blood drain from Xander's face. "Sorry."

"So you and Buffy are a... thing?" Xander asked trying not to feel jealous. He had no right.

"If me being her fuck toy because it's the only way she can feel something and then tells me that it's never going to happen again because there is no way she could ever care about a souless demon over and over again than yeah I guess we were a thing," Spike said sarcastically.

Knots formed in Xander's stomach. How could Buffy be so cruel? It was one thing to be mad at him, Anya, Tara and Willow they took heaven away from her. But Spike? He had nothing to do with it. "I'm sorry, Spike. You don't deserve that. Not from Buffy... not from anyone."

"Damn right I don't!" Spike stood up. "And that's why I'm leaving because I know if I stay it will keep happening. It's not good for me and it sure as hell ain't good for her."

"Where are you gonna go?" Xander asked. It felt like his throat was going to close up.

Spike shrugged as he grabbed his belongings. "Out of California that's for sure."

"Maybe... maybe I could go with you?" Xander suggested.

"What?" Spike asked confused. Yeah, so Xander just confessed to loving him but was he actually willing to leave his home? His family?

Xander looked flustered. "It doesn't have to be permament. I could just come with and once you've settled down I could back to Sunnydale."

Spike squinted his eyes as he looked at Xander. "But you don't want to. You want to stay with me."

"I'd be lying if I said I didn't," Xander answered. "Like I said, life is too short here to have regrets. Besides the girls don't need me. I thought maybe you might."

Spike knew he never did well on his own. Xander was good company, he was the one that kept Spike from completely falling apart after Buffy's death. They girls had needed both of them but Xander had been their glue. Their rock. As he looked at Xander Spike realized something. He had feelings for Xander for months but Xander had been with Anya and then Buffy came back and his unlife became all about her. But now he could breathe. He stared at Xander while Xander stared back. "Come here," Spike ordered softly.

Xander did as Spike said and walked up to them until they were almost touching. He's breath got caught in his throat. He didn't know why Spike wanted him to come to him but he knew what he hoped for.

After he licked his lips Spike said. "I want to kiss you but I kissed Buffy less than an hour ago."

"I don't care," Xander said truthfully. Spike could have kissed a hundred people in the last hour and Xander still wouldn't have cared.

The answer took Spike by surprise. He didn't think he'd give the same answer if the roles were reversed. Xander was a unique creature. With shaky hands Spike's placed them on Xander's cheeks. It was like everything was happening in slow motion as he leaned forward. Just as his lips touched he heard Xander's breath hitch in his throat.

Xander's hands wrapped around Spike and pulled him closer as their kiss deepened. This kiss was amazing as Xander thought. He ignored the smell of Buffy's perfume and focused completely on the feel and taste of Spike. Only when his oxygen levels were low did Xander pull away. His eyes dilated and wide. "Great googly moogly."

Spike snorted in amusement. He definitely wanted Xander to come with him and stick around. "We should head to your place and grab some of yourself. Can't bring it all with you," he warned.

"All I need is some clothes and you," Xander confirmed with a shy smile.

"And Twinkies obviously," Spike quipped.

The shy smile turned into a grin. "Obviously," Xander confirmed. "So where are we off to?"

"Haven't given it much thought. Figured we could live on the road until we decide on something."

The 'we' sent Xander's heart fluttering. "It'll be the road trip I never got! And I can find odd jobs as we go. We don't want my carpentry skills to go to waste!" Xander didn't think he he was ever so excited about something before. "I'll phone the girls when we're out of town. Anya has no doubt told them why I broke off the engagement and I really don't want them thinking I'm possessed... again."

Spike agreed. He didn't need Buffy using him as a punching bag. Passing his duffelbag to Xander, he picked up his cooler. "Come on, pet. Let's get out of this shit town."

Braver than he felt Xander tangled his fingers with Spike's. He waited for Spike to pull away, afraid he had been too bold. Instead of untangling their hands Spike gave his hand a reassuring squeeze.

Minutes later they were in the Desoto and headed out of town. Spike purposely ran over the Now Leaving Sunnydale sign. To Xander it was one of the best feelings in the world.

The End


End file.
